Which I really don't have at this point was spent on fish. Like 25$ on Mackarel- which better turn out great or I am going to throw a fit and clams--which better be kakka erachi. I hate experimenting!! No, that's not true. I hate experimenting when I am broke.
I am losing sleep over the smallest things. Yesterday night I spent three hours reading about IVF treatments for no reason at all and then I had horrid neck cramps and my ear was red because I had somehow twisted it while sleeping. This is all because my cousin had a baby. Even through my unreasonable jealous I managed to make the expected call and her mum said: oh he is so beautiful, a little man with lots of hair! Which then made me cry both happy and sadly?
I am in this Facebook group full of writers so neurosis isn't new or anything unexpected and every time someone posts some kind of rant about their issues and jealousies, and then will round it off with : I am a horrible person, am I not? And ten thousand people will chime back: NO! You are a beautiful human being with flaws. And this makes me smirk but tbh I was a little consoled knowing I could post stupidity and be told I am wonderful and then I tried it on Parus and I said blah blah blah, I am a terrible human being, am I not? And she said: Yes. You are. And I thought phew that was good. I needed that.
I am losing sleep over the smallest things. Yesterday night I spent three hours reading about IVF treatments for no reason at all and then I had horrid neck cramps and my ear was red because I had somehow twisted it while sleeping. This is all because my cousin had a baby. Even through my unreasonable jealous I managed to make the expected call and her mum said: oh he is so beautiful, a little man with lots of hair! Which then made me cry both happy and sadly?
I am in this Facebook group full of writers so neurosis isn't new or anything unexpected and every time someone posts some kind of rant about their issues and jealousies, and then will round it off with : I am a horrible person, am I not? And ten thousand people will chime back: NO! You are a beautiful human being with flaws. And this makes me smirk but tbh I was a little consoled knowing I could post stupidity and be told I am wonderful and then I tried it on Parus and I said blah blah blah, I am a terrible human being, am I not? And she said: Yes. You are. And I thought phew that was good. I needed that.
1 comment:
there's no winning with you, is there?
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