About Goa. We decided to save us some money and took a bus onward and a flight back. The Bus: I quite liked the bus even as it took a good 17hours ,but A looked nauseated after the first five hours. I found a couple of baby cockroaches intent on raiding my cutlet packet! There were quite a bit of foreigners mostly British I think on the bus. There were these two girls-very young with their backpacks and so on. When we stopped for first tea and then dinner they wore their shorts and tops and stepped out and sadly when they were crossing the road to get snacks from a shop opposite these guys on a bike flew past and screamed a word I care not to repeat here. They first smiled tentatively but looked uncomfortable almost immediately. It just threw me into this rage and I wished I had been closer to flip them off. This kind of stayed with me a bit and as I was following the Delhi protests and the deluge on FB and later when we were returning from Goa too. Because we hired a cab back to the airport and half way through the cab driver said, yehan se we will take a short cut. He said once more and suddenly I was all alert. And the way he took us through was this crumbling bad road with no human signs anywhere and the paranoid in me beat so loud convinced that he was taking us somewhere to rape me and beat A down and I couldn't think straight for the next few minutes till we reached the main road. How unbearable it must be to live in such a state of constant alert fear-fullness.
Goa itself turned out to be relaxing. One thing we had to remember was that when our mums asked we had to lie about having been there before. We could really just tell them that yes, we were there about four years ago but since we already lied it would mean an uncomfortable moment and I suppose I am actually all right with lying to their faces when it means one awkward moment reduced. Nevertheless we ate--nothing worth writing about save for this place called Lila Cafe at Baga which had the best food I had in the whole trip and Thalassa was great too I suppose except it was dark and what we were paying for was for the view and not the food-which was meh--or maybe I ordered wrong. Going by all the comments, we went to Brittos too and again I wasn't particularly happy. I think Kerala does fish better. Although the Goan dessert-Bebinca-- was so utterly fabulous that I want to learn all the secret touches to making it so fabulous. I also wanted to try Shark Ambottik but finally somehow forgot about it.
A and I had a good time. At home we somehow get way too much on each other's nerves and although we let it go fairly fast it is still quite tiring to be so annoyed with each other. Which was why Goa was good for us. At Thalassa I ran into someone--actually I saw and hid from someone is more appropriate-- I knew from long ago. I have really nothing against her except she belongs to a part of my world that I try very hard to repress and so I panicked and I needed a minute to be normal and ended up a little abrupt with A, to his suprise. Outside while on the bike, I told him and he was decent about it. And then. God of coincidences must hate me because at Cochin airport I turn around and run straight into her.We were on the same flight apparently. She gave me a warm hug which made me feel quite cheap but again my instinct was to somehow run away and she said, let's meet up and I agreed thinking it would be one of those things people say to get out of a situation. But she did mail me and now I suppose I ought to go. A says when someone tries that hard they deserve a gesture back. All true, all so true.
It was my Dad's birthday and knowing that only me and A would be wishing him, we called him. His evil alien mother must have wished of course but anyway he was subdued and yet eager which hurts each time. And he asked will you come stay with me. And I when ambushed cower and stutter and he said, I am coming on 6th!!! to Cochin and then you can come back with me and stay for a few days. And to that expectant silence I had to say, let me check and call you back. How impersonal and how hateful. Also I had the most meanest thought when he said 6th. I thought thank god, it's the days when I am with P, so I will only have to struggle so much. And then of course I gave me hell about it. But I have decided I am done done done with trying to help. If this is their destiny let them figure it out.
I have also not been reading enough but making Amazon book wishlists instead. Which btw is a fabulous fabulous list. Let me give you a short insight.
Four New Messages-Joshua Cohen
How should a person be- Sheila Heti
The Liar's club-Mary Karr
Raag Darbari-Lal Sukra Sri
The Complete Essays-Montaigne
Salvage the Bones-Jesmyn Ward
aaand more.
We had a good anniversary and it's three years of being married and I am happy to report that being married is really a good place to be and I had never thought that was possible. Maybe three years is a milestone of signal catching because we are able to decode most of each others grunts and other sounds which is quite interesting and so onward to more and so on.
Goa itself turned out to be relaxing. One thing we had to remember was that when our mums asked we had to lie about having been there before. We could really just tell them that yes, we were there about four years ago but since we already lied it would mean an uncomfortable moment and I suppose I am actually all right with lying to their faces when it means one awkward moment reduced. Nevertheless we ate--nothing worth writing about save for this place called Lila Cafe at Baga which had the best food I had in the whole trip and Thalassa was great too I suppose except it was dark and what we were paying for was for the view and not the food-which was meh--or maybe I ordered wrong. Going by all the comments, we went to Brittos too and again I wasn't particularly happy. I think Kerala does fish better. Although the Goan dessert-Bebinca-- was so utterly fabulous that I want to learn all the secret touches to making it so fabulous. I also wanted to try Shark Ambottik but finally somehow forgot about it.
A and I had a good time. At home we somehow get way too much on each other's nerves and although we let it go fairly fast it is still quite tiring to be so annoyed with each other. Which was why Goa was good for us. At Thalassa I ran into someone--actually I saw and hid from someone is more appropriate-- I knew from long ago. I have really nothing against her except she belongs to a part of my world that I try very hard to repress and so I panicked and I needed a minute to be normal and ended up a little abrupt with A, to his suprise. Outside while on the bike, I told him and he was decent about it. And then. God of coincidences must hate me because at Cochin airport I turn around and run straight into her.We were on the same flight apparently. She gave me a warm hug which made me feel quite cheap but again my instinct was to somehow run away and she said, let's meet up and I agreed thinking it would be one of those things people say to get out of a situation. But she did mail me and now I suppose I ought to go. A says when someone tries that hard they deserve a gesture back. All true, all so true.
It was my Dad's birthday and knowing that only me and A would be wishing him, we called him. His evil alien mother must have wished of course but anyway he was subdued and yet eager which hurts each time. And he asked will you come stay with me. And I when ambushed cower and stutter and he said, I am coming on 6th!!! to Cochin and then you can come back with me and stay for a few days. And to that expectant silence I had to say, let me check and call you back. How impersonal and how hateful. Also I had the most meanest thought when he said 6th. I thought thank god, it's the days when I am with P, so I will only have to struggle so much. And then of course I gave me hell about it. But I have decided I am done done done with trying to help. If this is their destiny let them figure it out.
I have also not been reading enough but making Amazon book wishlists instead. Which btw is a fabulous fabulous list. Let me give you a short insight.
Four New Messages-Joshua Cohen
How should a person be- Sheila Heti
The Liar's club-Mary Karr
Raag Darbari-Lal Sukra Sri
The Complete Essays-Montaigne
Salvage the Bones-Jesmyn Ward
aaand more.
We had a good anniversary and it's three years of being married and I am happy to report that being married is really a good place to be and I had never thought that was possible. Maybe three years is a milestone of signal catching because we are able to decode most of each others grunts and other sounds which is quite interesting and so onward to more and so on.
1 comment:
Happy anniversary!! And yes, to many many more. Do send the wishlist link for a peek :)
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